7/28/2017 20 Comments a few reflectionsOur three weeks in Uvita has come to an end and we are re-acclimating to life back in North Carolina. It's a great life that I'm very thankful for but it's a good deal more hectic than life on a Central American beach. It feels full of demands that I didn't have while pretending to be Costa Rican. Here's my short list of take-aways that I'm working on:
1. Slow down. Get bored. Life isn't a race. In fact, I'd like to squeeze as many beautiful moments out of it as humanly possible but this isn't going to happen if I'm rushing from one thing to the next and the next. My mom told me years ago that I needed bigger margins. It's brilliant (which if you know my mom, you aren't surprised!). Life margins are absolutely necessary. This begs the question, why do we reserve naps for babies and seniors? I am bringing napping back yo. This doesn't mean I am going to quit working, boycott homework or cancel all after-school activities but it does mean it's time to impose some seriously big margins between each priority so everyone can breathe...and nap from time to time. 2. Live life for YOURSELF Being so far from everything that I knew and any external expectations, I had the chance to reconsider how I wanted to live each day both on this trip, and more permanently at home. This sounds like a selfish path but I prefer to think of it as an honest one. Societal expectation has always pulled on me in a big way. I'm a pleaser. I want others to like me. I want to do the right thing and say the right thing. I want to be a part of the group. Being able to step back from the subconscious responses that are meant to please everyone else, I could see more clearly what means the most to me and focus on just that. Can I get an AMEN?! 3. Smaller spaces = more cuddling Two years ago, Mike and I built a big home that afforded us each a generous plenty personal space. Here's the thing though, when you have a ton of space, you don't see each other as much. Our house in CR was two bedrooms, two bathrooms and a living/kitchen area and large outdoor living space. While our spaces were open, there was not much of it and we lived close and cuddled a lot. We played games on each other's beds, laid side-by-side reading books, stood behind one another while brushing teeth. Are we going to sell our house now and buy a tree house off the grid? Mike would shout "NO" from the rooftops. But we are having a sleepover in our room tonight complete with a movie and air mattresses. We need each other and we have to be close to get what we need. This goes for friends too so my peeps better get ready for some hand-holding :) 4. Stuff is overrated Don't get me wrong, I like a good cashmere blanket as much as the next girl but I had a "stuff" catharsis. Our first day at the beach we had towels, my camera, a boogie board, sunscreen, goggles, hats and who knows what else. The beach is part of a national park and required us to park outside of the entrance and walk in. Park officials were adamant that we should never leave our belongings at the risk of someone walking off with them so Mike and I spent the day taking turns swimming with the kids and hauling all the gear around the beach. Funny thing was, I took very few pictures, we never rode the boogie board nor did we wear the goggles or the hats. We made mental notes not to make that same mistake again. The next day we headed back with water and towels that we left in the car and headed to the beach in just our bathing suits. We spent 4 hours walking, body surfing, hermit crab racing and resting in the shade of the palm trees. We headed home exhausted and never once needed an umbrella or cabana boy (although with said cabana boy, I guess all the stuff would have been a lot easier to carry!). The life lesson here is that to live large, we need a lot less. 5. Even in paradise, it's not always paradise Quick tongues and losing patience, being scared or frustrated are all parts of our humanity. We are flawed and no matter how far away we go or how beautiful the surroundings, those flaws will still be there. And thank God they are because that's what keeps us humble. It forces us to continue to work on ourselves for the benefit of the people and the world around us. Having realistic expectations of life is ever more important to me and understanding that there will be lemons that can't or won't turn into lemonade is a fact to make peace with.
20 Comments
Kate S
7/29/2017 04:42:40 am
Well said! Reading this was the perfect, reflective way to start my day.
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Tyler
7/29/2017 08:18:22 am
Thanks Kate! Looking forward to some tennis soon ;)
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Jessica Allen
7/29/2017 05:19:02 am
I love this! People pleasers unite and say NO! Glad to have you back...don't move!! xo
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Tyler
7/29/2017 08:19:36 am
Ha, YES Jessica! A revolution has begun.
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Amy Robinson
7/29/2017 05:30:45 am
I love this!!! Thank you for sharing such great insight! I think you're brilliant like your mom! 😍
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Tyler
7/29/2017 08:21:35 am
Love me some Amy, thanks so much. Tennis followed by lunch soon!
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Nicole Marsigli
7/29/2017 05:34:01 am
So proud of you!! Truly! Reading this feels like our "solving world peace" shenanigans on my front stoop (without my interjections). This sounds beautiful with just your words. Love you so much. PS I'll hold your hand any day of the week! 😊
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Tyler
7/29/2017 08:24:41 am
Aw, I'm blushing and ready for some porch musings tonight. What issue should we tackle next?! How about why even after a very elaborate cover to my garden, the squirrels still seem to be taking all the tomatoes? They have been put here by the devil, I just know it.
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Lisa Howell
7/29/2017 09:53:46 am
Loved your comments! It sounds like this trip came at the perfect time for all!
Betsy Ehrenberger
7/29/2017 01:22:57 pm
Tyler! I just love you!!!! This is wonderful!! I am reading this as we are sitting in our beautiful, but tiny hotel room in Paris -all 4 of us cuddled together. Can't wait to catch up and chat about our trips! Have had some similar feelings the last couple weeks. You are my wise friend!!!
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Tyler
8/1/2017 05:55:48 am
How wonderful for you Betsy! I know you are loving every one of those precious moments. Can't wait to hear about it.
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Peggy Burns
7/29/2017 02:57:12 pm
Tyler, how beautifully you have shared and expressed your discoveries! If only we could all learn some of these truths. Yes, we all need each other to spend quality time, share more hugs, and learn to enjoy life more with less stress and "stuff" that can get in the way of true contentment.
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Tyler
8/1/2017 05:56:40 am
Thanks for your note Peggy! So, so true.
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Annie
7/29/2017 06:01:08 pm
Amen, as requested;) So poignant!
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Joelle
8/2/2017 04:06:04 am
Wow! Sounds like an amazing experience for you and your family! I loved reading this and it will hopefully make me stop and think about our busy lives, too! Hope to see you soon! Thanks so much for sharing!
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Tyler
8/2/2017 04:22:59 am
Thanks Joelle! A daily challenge isn't it? Hope to see you soon.
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Alicia Bishop
1/17/2018 06:53:35 am
Hey!!!! We saw your comments on vrbo. We are planning a trip with our two children (15 and 12) in July. Did yall get much rain....I see you went in June. Also, any places that you would recommend that we should for sure visit?
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Tyler Cunningham
1/17/2018 12:06:56 pm
Hi Alicia, our first week was almost completely dry which was very unseasonable. After that it rained almost every day at some point but it was never a problem. If you get out and take advantage of the morning, the rain comes in around lunch or a little after just in time for a siesta then often clears back up again. Are you staying in the Pura Uvita property or somewhere else? Happy to answer any questions if you message me directly at tyler@tylercunninghamphotography.com. Jealous of your trip, wish we were going back!
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aboutWelcome to my blog Photos + Footnotes. I am Tyler Cunningham and I love taking pictures. It is the best way I know how to express myself and my view of the world. It's when I'm behind the camera that I'm most comfortable. I see colors and details, I observe connections between people. I see joy and pain, abundance and poverty. I am my least judgmental behind the lens, simply seeing and recording. It is how I process the abundance of information the world throws at me. ArchivesCategories |
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